Cuteoverload.com - a guilty pleasure for snowy nights

What?  You have a problem with gophers kissing?  Get over it.  It's part of our lives now.  

I miss these puppies and we've never even met.

Oh big dog... yes, I will give you a pet.  And a scratch behind the ears.  Yes I will.  Who's a good dog?  You are.  Yes you are.

Rrrrrrrraaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!

 

Love this feeling.  

SHUT UP LAMB!!!  

My favourite duck.    

K. My trip to the Doctor's office.

Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess.  Me.  Anne.  Anne Baxter is my name.  I was driving my Sunfire, Phyllis, by Thorncliff Medical Centre and saw a sign advertising a new doctor taking patients.  I got an appointment and the doc sent me on a fasting quest to the mystical forest of blood and urine samples.  When I returned, the doc went through my results...

"Well, Annie, looks good and good and... hey, do you eat a lot of fruits and vegetables?"

"Sure do boss!"

"Yeah... the thing is, your potassium level looks high here.  I'm going to get you to stop eating fruits and vegetables."

"Even vegetables?" (This was literally what I said.)

"Fresh ones especially."

"Uhhh, Doc, the thing is... I'm vegetarian."

"Go to the mystical forest again Friday.  Come back Monday."

"Until then stay away from potassium!  I'm a doctor!"

So... looking into potassium levels further, it appears almost everything I love is choc full of it.  But you know what doesn't have a ton of potassium?  No, really... do you?  

Someone said they were "stumped" and

The first thing I thought was - well, you can search for the "root" of the problem, or "branch out"

Sometimes I hate myself.

Did I say I was going to start posting again?

Ughhh. I'm terrible!
I could write many excuses, but I know you won't have it.

So... let's write for a couple minutes. (We're talking quantity over quality here)

Some religious dudes just came to my door. They asked me if I knew about heaven and if there is a heaven, how to get in. I said I'm pretty sure I'm on the guest list for rock and roll heaven, but you better give me those pamphlets anyway. Actually, there was just some polite yabber and I took 2 magazines so they would leave. One is called "Awake!" and the teaser articles on the front are "Is Divorce the Answer?", as well as "Also: Is belief in God reasonable?"
The second mag is called "The Watchtower - Announcing Jehova's Kingdom" It only has one article listed on the front, and it's a real doozy : "Do All Good People Go To Heaven?"
Without reading any of these articles I know the "answers" to all of them. And, yes children, the answers involve a lot of quotation marks and conversions. I hate how all of these questions are answered with no hesitation by the bible. Well, in this chapter, it says this, so we can infer that this is the answer IRREVOCABLY WITH NO ARGUMENTS. Problem is - you can get the bible to say pretty much whatever you want if you pull out the right passages... and the new testament was put together by a bunch of Roman dudes who decided how they wanted Jesus to be viewed so they could bring their empire closer together. I mean, if you're into God - awesome. But, I think most Christians realize that the bible is not meant to be taken literally word for word. Otherwise... Adam and Eve's babies incested it up - which the bible also condemns... so... slippery slope.
I've read one Jehovah's Witness mag before and they had a big spread on what god loves and we should love and what god hates and we should hate and I think the hate thing is what broke my back. (I'm a camel) Anyway... yadda yadda yadda... shouldn't talk religion.
Anyway - that's a peek into my day. I also bought a 5 dollar cupcake to support Haiti. Students keep selling baked goods for Haiti and I keep buying them, thinking it's a great excuse to eat poorly. Which it is... but I need to stop. It was a Crave Cupcake and it was mounded with icing and it was so rich and moist and amazing... but now I'll skip breakfast. Oy vey. Isn't my life just the hardest? I want to smack myself sometimes. Anyway - workie workie.

I Bought CD's Again Today

Hello reader,

How lone have been the winter hours without blog smalltalk? At least that adorable puppy of the day is on here. "You don't walk away with nothin'", that's The Daily Puppy's motto. But still, no good. I sorry!! Look at the cute puppy's face to determine my level of regret. A cute puppy!!! Ahhh, whatever. There is more to blogging than puppies. Why, even recently a few of me favourite blogs shut down production. Thank the lord for http://theerinberjainenewsletter.blogspot.com/ lighting the way Anyway. I bought CD's again today.
It's a bit of a compulsion. I know it's an unnecessary expense... but it feels so good. I need to flesh out my collection. The mixed CD's are happening, but there are staples that go unrepresented and uncherished. They're so pretty to collect. So pretty to hear and hold. To honour and obey. (Just kidding about the obey part) Do you guys still go out and buy CD's? It's so frivolous and I bought Tom Waits "Franks Wild Years", Queens of the Stone Age Live DVD CD set, and another Eagles of Death Metal,"Death By Sexy." Anyway, great stuff. So spicy. And I DIDN'T buy shoes today. So it totally evens out. Right? I just won't buy shoes? Who needs shoes? Not me. Shut up, pinky toes. My shoes fit fine. SHUT UP SHUT UP GET OUT OF MY HEAD PINKY TOES! YOU RUTHLESS MONGERS! (Just kidding again)
Just fine.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm coming back for a bit. :D Hi!!!

Ask The Magic 8 Ball!!! New Years 2010 Edition

Hey Magic 8 Ball. Happy New Year!

Q1: Any resolutions for 2010?
A1: Most likely

Comment: Haha, oh 8 ball. I feel like we're on the same page with this one. One thing I'm going to try is taking the bus to school 3x a week.

Q2: Will 2010 be "The Year of Anne"?
A2: My sources say no.

Comment: Can't win em all, eh 8 ball?

Q3: Sylvia Browne predicts "Aliens will begin to show themselves in the year 2010, they will not harm us, they simply want to see what we are doing to this planet. They will teach us how to use anti-gravity devices again, such as they did for the pyramids." (P.S. Give me a break and give the Egyptians some credit, 8 Ball, but roll with me...) Anyhoo, my question is... is Sylvia Browne right, or what?
A3: Yes.

Comment: I'm going to go ahead and call straight up bullshit on this one, Eighty. Like that time you told me I was going to die in a car accident when I was 19.

Which I DIDN'T. AND TOTALLY DIDN'T EVEN STRESS ABOUT FOR 2 YEARS, BECAUSE YOU'RE JUST AN EIGHT BALL. Don't look at me like that. 8 Ball!! Don't. Don't look at me like that. I'm sorry too. It's just that I watched this documentary about ancient egyptian engineers and... you know, it made a convincing point about how Egyptians probably didn't have the help of aliens in building pyramids.